Embracing Connection in a Divided World
In the midst of our busy lives, we often encounter crossroads where we feel forced to make a choice—this or that, right or wrong, faith or science. Our language reflects this tendency toward division. But what if we embraced a different path? What if instead of living in the tension of or, we opened ourselves to the inclusive, expansive possibility of and?
This question came to me recently as I sat with a new personal challenge: learning Aramaic. Aramaic, the language most likely spoken by Jesus, has a fascinating structure. In both Aramaic and Hebrew, a single letter can be attached to the beginning of a word to signify connection, much like the English conjunction and. It’s simple, yet profoundly connective. Even the sound of the letter feels like it carries the breath of unity.
As I reflected on this, I realized how often I get caught in the trap of either/or thinking. It’s easy to fall into the dualistic mindset—dividing life into neat categories like right or wrong, good or evil, strength or weakness. But the reality is rarely that simple. Life is full of nuance, complexity, and paradoxes that demand something more from us.
The Transformative Power of Holding Paradox
Consider the paradox of strength and vulnerability. On the surface, they seem like opposites. We’re often taught that to be strong is to be invulnerable, unshakable. Yet, some of the greatest examples of true strength come through moments of vulnerability. For me, the life and example of Jesus illustrate this beautifully. The ultimate display of his strength wasn’t found in dominance or control but in his willingness to give of himself completely—a vulnerability that reveals a profound and sacred strength.
This isn’t just a theological idea; it’s deeply human. We all carry both our humanity and our divinity, moments of weakness and moments of profound courage. When we embrace both, rather than forcing ourselves into the constraints of or, we discover a more authentic, compassionate way of living.
Connection in Community and Relationship
I’ve spent over four decades in faith leadership roles, and if there’s one lesson that stands out, it’s this: community thrives in the space of and. People within the same faith community can—and often do—see the world differently. Yet, they can still remain united through shared love and respect.
This has been true in my own marriage of 33 years. Disagreements are inevitable, but what matters is how we hold those moments of tension. Can we disagree and remain connected? Can we challenge one another and continue to love deeply? The beauty of and is that it allows us to hold space for complexity, for difference, and for deeper understanding.
Living Interconnected Lives
This shift from or to and isn’t just about language—it reflects something deeply sacred about how we are interconnected with one another, with the earth, and with the universe itself. We belong to one another. We are, in every sense of the word, connected.
I often find myself wrestling with questions that seem, at first glance, incompatible. For example, how can faith and evolution coexist? For some, these ideas seem to be at odds. But if we allow ourselves to hold them in tension, to explore how they might dance together, we discover something richer—an invitation to see the divine woven into the vast tapestry of creation’s unfolding story.
Reframing Our Lives with “And”
This week, I’ve noticed how often I fall back into the or mindset. Even something as trivial as scrolling through my social media feed can pull me into a divisive space. But I’ve also noticed that when I pause and intentionally look for the ands, my perspective shifts. I become more compassionate, more open, and more connected.
So here’s my challenge for you—and for myself: What if every time you’re tempted to choose between this or that, you ask instead, Is there room for both? Can you find a way to hold tension, embrace paradox, and see the possibility of and?
Language shapes how we see the world. A simple shift in conjunctions can open us to a deeper, more sacred understanding of connection—one that reflects the truth that you are infinitely precious and unconditionally loved for the gift you already are.
Infinitely Precious 